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This is a continuation of my journal from my 2001-2002 school year.  Please read the previous posts to give this entry context.  

Friday

Amanda was pissed that people in the class were talking about Elizabeth’s kiss.  She acted indignant at the gossip.  When I added my two cents worth about “the big smackeroo,” she glowered at me.

“I was right there,” I defended myself.

“Well, you don’t have to talk about it.”

That is so typical of her.  She sets up the melodrama and then acts melodramatically outraged at natural responses.  Very emotionally manipulative.  The way she uses Elizabeth reminds me of a ranch dog cutting a cow from the herd.

I sent out an email last week to see if anyone had inherited the students I lost at the semester.  No one replied except the reading teacher.  She hadn’t received either student, but she’d had them in her reading class, knew where they’d gone, and bothered to respond.  This even though her mother recently passed away back in South Dakota.  She is amazing that way.  For some reason beyond my ken, Angel was switched to the Academic Learning Center.  This is generally a place for non-graduates from middle school or for students like Jesus from fifth period with his horrendous attendance.

We had a rally schedule today.  I’m so glad I never corrected the school’s oversight.  They omitted me from the lists of who needs to supervise, when and where.  I don’t even feel guilty.  I’m bone-level exhausted.  I usually don’t feel this way until March.  Maybe it’s because we started a week earlier, maybe it’s due to all the meetings.  ¿Quíen sabe? 

Monday, February 18, 2002

I’ve been correcting observational essays off and on during the three-day weekend.  Becky, Xochitl, Roberto, Amanda, and Lupe have not turned in essays even though on Tuesday they’ll be five days past due, a twenty-five point deduction.  Lupe is the biggest surprise, although she shared that she had computer problems and I am expecting a very late essay from her.  Becky may come back from her five-day suspension with an essay. Roberto and Xochitl seem to have resigned themselves to failure.  When I think of Roberto, I think of the word hapless.  It’s denotation doesn’t fit; Roberto’s misfortune is of his own making.  But there’s something about the connotation of the word—the way it connects for me with words like woebegone that make it fit him.

The final person without an essay is Amanda. She is angry and self-sabotaging.  I’ll show you.  I won’t turn in my work.  I’ve seen this ridiculous and maddening revenge a few dozen times in my career.  As the intended target, I can’t do much.  Acting like I care plays into the student’s hand.

Raymond’s essay was on Amanda.  He gave her the alias Rosaura “because she acts a little bit like Rosaura from the Rugrats.”  He titled his essay “Rosaura’s Attitude.”  It was a poorly written essay replete with small i’s and apostrophes misplaced in contractions, but was an honest and enlightening piece:

. . . I went around asking people what they thought about Rosaura and I got a lot of negative things.  It looks like not a lot of girls or guys like Rosaura.  This girl told me that she could selfsentered and some other classmates said that shes really bossy.  Some of the guys dont like her because . . . . . . I cant say its really bad stuff.  I did tell some of the girls to give me an example, and they gave me a great example.  The example was when she was the teacher for the caught ya’s.  They said that thats when they started hating her.  I remember that she was almost finish and Lupe or someone would say “you miss one” and she would say “wait up im not done yet! god!!”  I tought that was funny.  Rosaura is pretty cool to me even though we dont know each other.  It looks that she could get along with most of the people she just has to drop the attitude a little. . . .”

Amen. 

Adriana

The other day Elizabeth remarked, “AVID is cool.”

“AVID?  I was going to be in that program,” Adriana said. 

“You should be, Adriana,” I said.  “You would make a perfect AVID student.”

Adriana is exactly the target student—a solid, above average student who could use a boost to be truly college ready.